Not a winner.

So it's the beginning of February and the UK are all ready for Eurovision. For so many years we've had to wait until the last minute before finding out who was going to represent us.

However, with the passing of Wogan's reign over the ridicule of Eurovision in the UK, we were told that it was now time to take it seriously again to bring the Eurovision back to the UK shores, rather than being the laughing stock of the rest of Europe.

With UK fans having been told this numerous times before by the BBC, could we believe that this year was any different?

Enter Lord Andrew Lloyd Webber, probably one of the best musical writers ever known (well, in my eyes anyway!) Maybe we were going to take it seriously this time. Stepping into Wogan's shoes, to take it seriously.... we choose a comedian!!?!

To choose our entrant, 5 shows - 4 being live, with Andrew Lloyd Webber writing the song for the winner. Seriousness is thrown out of the window right from the start with some lame sketches from a "Eurovision bunker". Why do we have to find comedy in every show about comedy? Even when ALW and Norton were involved in the choosing of main roles for Westend shows, there had to be some bad jokes.

So show 1 is all about the choosing of people for the live shows.... five people are chosen and it's then a choice between two female groups..... OR SO WE ARE LED TO BELIEVE!!!!!! Both groups are not chosen and hey presto, at the end of the show we are told that Jade has now qualified...... JADE WHO?

Now those who know the recent history of the BBC will know that they have been in trouble numerous times for fake competition winners and competitions where most had no chance of winning. So the alarm bells are ringing already. At this point I knew that Jade would represent the UK.

In the first live show, we are shown that talent doesn't stop you from being voted out when a strong contender is voted off first. However, future votes in live shows aren't really a surprise except for the fact that "The twins" unbelievably make it to the final.

In the meantime, it's announced that the lyricist for the song will be Diane Warren, famous for many blockbusting songs. So we look like we're going to have a very good song for Jade to sing... Oops sorry, the winner to sing!

So in the final, each finalist sings three songs. The second song being ALW's song. Marc sings it first and immediately you can see that it doesn't suit him and sounds too much like a musical finale - obviously the ALW background and Marc's background is too much for this combination in Eurovision. The twins are next and are better. They show that this song is definitely for a female, but just seem to lack something needed for a big arena. Next comes the winner, Jade, and shows that this song seems to have been made for her as it totally suits her.

So totally amazing voting in the final has Marc finish in 3rd.... could the UK public voting yet again sabotage the UK's chances? The twins for Eurovision?!, not likely, remember the plant - oops sorry another slip - Jade wins and everyone's happy - including ALW who you can see is totally relieved that the twins didn't win!

So to song..... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ - Oops sorry, fell asleep thinking of the song again! Yes, it's bad! Don't know how long Diane took with the lyrics, but she was either not paid enough, had a plane to catch or just didn't care, but they are awful and repetitive. I'm sure I've read somewhere that "It's my time" is repeated 40-odd times within 3 minutes. After listening to it three times in the final, I was ready to turn over.

So what's the bottom line in my opinion?....... I'm sure we'll attract a few more votes than last year, depending on if a newcomer, Jade, can handle the pressure on the night. If she does well, a top half finish is possible. I doubt that we'll be going to London in 2010, as I don't think the song has enough to stand out amongst all of the other entries.